Friday, May 10, 2013

More on pregnancy

I am just on the cusp of starting my 2nd trimester. Woot! And I'm already starting to show! Woo...oh. No, that one kind of sucks since pretty much all of the baby websites essentially say, "If you're showing already, you're probably eating too much. Or you're just gassy." Thanks. I found one, one, site which said that if you're starting to show at this stage it could simply be a combination of your figure and how you're carrying. After that I realized that where my baby bump is starting to form is exactly in the spot which used to be the slenderest part of my torso. Of course it's visible already! Instant relief, and no more baby websites for me.
For the record, I haven't gained weight anywhere except for my waist and boobs. I've checked, almost obsessively. My pants still fit everywhere except my waist. My arms don't seem fatter, although they are less toned. (I should start lifting light weights again.) I've been doing my best to be careful about what I eat, which is sort of mandatory for me anyway with the ways my body has been reacting to foods. Now that the worst of my food aversions and morning sickness are over (mostly), or somewhat under control, I'm back to eating my normal diet, with a few adjustments. So here's what it's like, for me, to be at this stage of pregnancy. This is what my body tells me:

"Oh, you ate two hours ago? Time to eat again."

"It's been 2 1/2 hours since you last ate? Well then screw you. I'm going to make you gag over every bite you put in your mouth, no matter how tasty it is and how much you need it."

"Your husband made one of your favorite foods, which happens to be super nutritious? Ha! No, you don't want anything except a grilled cheese sandwich."

"Brushing your teeth first thing in the morning? Enjoy the dry heaving!" (At least this one means that I don't really gag during the rest of the day, unless I break one of the other rules.)

"You ate enough to feel full? Raging heartburn. You're welcome."

"You drank three cups of water in the last hour? You're still dehydrated. Have fun with the record-breaking pee you're about to have, though."

"Middle of the night wake up to pee? Oh good, snack time! Good luck getting back to sleep after this, by the way."

"You didn't have a snack in the middle of the night? Enjoy being sick for the next two days."

"You know that thing you've been kinda wanting to eat for the last four days which you finally made or bought? Take one bite. I can promise you won't want it anymore."

"You used to walk up stairs without getting winded? Not anymore! Now you'll sound like an asthmatic trying to run a marathon."

"That smell that's making you sick? I can guarantee that animals are the only other ones who can smell it. And they all love the smell."

"Congratulations, you stayed up until 10:30! Now get into bed before I make you fall asleep upright. And I will make you drool on yourself if you force me to do that."

Believe it or not, all of this is better than things were just a few weeks ago. I'm making pregnancy sound so fun, right? It is, and it isn't. There are major trade-offs. On the other hand, I never have to clean the cat box. And when I looked at the state of the toilet last night I was able to get a grudging, "Fine, sure," when I told Shane that he could clean the damn toilet once in a while. (That is the first time that has happened, ever. We'll see about the follow-through. But his parents are visiting next weekend, so I'm hoping that will motivate him.)
There's also just the sheer coolness factor of having a baby growing in me. I'm creating a life, a thought which makes me smile every time. I hear babies laughing, even babies crying, and think, "Wow, in just a few months I'll have one of those!" and it's a happy thought. I can't wait to feel the baby kick, and to finally meet this kid.

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